Bila saya tanya orang tentang perangai bakal pasangan, adakah itu mengumpat?

Tidak; bertanya dan memberi maklumat jujur tentang calon pasangan untuk tujuan perkahwinan adalah diharuskan , malah termasuk nasihat. Fatimah binti Qais r.a. meminta pandangan Nabi ﷺ tentang dua peminang, lalu baginda menyebut kelemahan masing-masing dengan jujur dan mencadangkan Usamah. Imam an-Nawawi menyenaraikan perundingan dalam urusan perkahwinan antara keadaan ghibah yang dibenarkan. Syaratnya: bertanya kepada orang yang benar-benar mengenali, menyebut perkara yang relevan sahaja, tidak berlebihan, dan berniat ikhlas. Orang yang ditanya pula wajib jujur dan tidak menyembunyikan perkara penting — agama itu nasihat.

Soal Jawab › Persediaan & memilih pasangan

🧭 Persediaan & memilih pasangan · #30

When I ask people about my future spouse's character, is that backbiting?

No; asking about and giving honest information on a prospective spouse for the purpose of marriage is permissible, and is even a form of sincere advice.
Fatimah bint Qais r.a. sought the Prophet's ﷺ view on two suitors, and he honestly mentioned the shortcomings of each and suggested Usamah. Imam an-Nawawi lists consultation in marriage matters among the situations in which ghibah is permitted. The conditions: ask people who truly know the person, mention only relevant matters, do not exaggerate, and have a sincere intention. The person asked must in turn be honest and not hide important matters — religion is sincere advice.

Sumber

Sahih Muslim 1480Sahih Muslim 55an-Nawawi, Riyadh as-Salihin (bab ghibah yang diharuskan)

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Soalan berkaitan

Must I tell my future spouse about my illness?Yes, an illness or defect that affects the marriage must be disclosed; hiding it is deception. …My future spouse has a chronic illness. Should I go ahead?It is permissible to go ahead with the marriage if you know their condition and accept it willingly; accepting a sick spouse sincerely is…My future husband/wife does not pray. Should I marry them?Abandoning prayer is a major sin; it is better not to proceed with the marriage until they have truly changed, because…My future spouse has a dark past. Should I go ahead?If they have sincerely repented and are now steadfast, their past should not be an obstacle; Allah accep…My future spouse follows a different religious understanding or practice. Is that a problem?Differences in secondary matters (furu') such as school-based practices can usually be managed, but significant differences in creed …My match is slow in coming. What should I do?Keep praying and making effort in permitted ways, while thinking well of Allah's decree. A spouse is part of div…

Jawapan ini rujukan umum, bukan fatwa. Untuk keadaan anda, rujuk pejabat agama, peguam syarie atau Mahkamah Syariah negeri.

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