ʿIddah, ihdad and rujuk (reconciliation)

1What ʿiddah is and its wisdom

ʿIddah is the obligatory waiting period a woman must observe after her marriage ends — whether through talaq, judicial dissolution (fasakh), khulʿ or the husband's death — before she may marry another man.

Among its wisdoms:

• Ensuring the womb is clear and the child's lineage is preserved.
• Giving husband and wife room to think and to reconcile in a revocable (raj'i) talaq.
• Honouring the marriage bond and, for a widow, mourning her husband's death.

2Table of ʿiddah periods

The ʿiddah period depends on the reason for the separation and the woman's circumstances:

3The wife's rights during ʿiddah

Allah says: "Do not turn them out of their houses, nor should they leave" (Surah at-Talaq 65:1) and "Lodge them where you dwell according to your means… and if they are pregnant, spend on them until they give birth" (Surah at-Talaq 65:6).

4General prohibitions during ʿiddah

• May not marry another man until the ʿiddah ends (Surah al-Baqarah 2:235). A marriage contract made during the ʿiddah is void.
• May not be proposed to openly. For a woman in the ʿiddah of death or of an irrevocable (ba'in) talaq, an indirect proposal is permitted (2:235); in the ʿiddah of a revocable (raj'i) talaq, even an indirect proposal is forbidden because she is still legally another man's wife.
• Does not leave the ʿiddah home without need (65:1). Going out for work, medical treatment or important matters is permitted according to the majority, especially during the day.
• The husband may not turn the wife out of the ʿiddah home unless she commits a manifest indecency (65:1).

5Ihdad — mourning for a widow

The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: "It is not lawful for a woman who believes in Allah and the Last Day to mourn a death for more than three days, except for a husband — four months and ten days" (Sahih al-Bukhari 5334; narrated by Muslim).

Ihdad is obligatory on a widow throughout the ʿiddah of death. What must be avoided:

• Wearing perfume and make-up, including kohl and henna for adornment.
• Clothing intended for adornment (bright or luxurious).
• Jewellery and adornments.
• Spending the night outside the ʿiddah home without need — based on the hadith of Furay'ah bint Malik, who was told to stay in her home until her ʿiddah ended (narrated by Abu Dawud and at-Tirmidhi; graded hasan sahih by at-Tirmidhi).

What is permitted: bathing, combing the hair, cutting the nails, wearing ordinary clean clothes, speaking to unrelated men when needed, working and going out for important matters.

6Rujuk (reconciliation) — conditions and wording

Rujuk is returning a wife divorced by revocable (raj'i) talaq to the marriage bond during the ʿiddah, without a new contract. Allah says: "And their husbands have more right to take them back in that period if they desire reconciliation" (Surah al-Baqarah 2:228).

Conditions of rujuk (Shafi'i school):

1. The talaq is revocable (raj'i) — not khulʿ, not a third talaq, and the marriage was consummated.
2. The wife is still in her ʿiddah.
3. The husband is of age, of sound mind and acting of his own free will.
4. A clear wording, for example "I take you back (rujuk)", not tied to a condition or a time limit.

The consent of the wife and her wali is not a condition for the validity of rujuk according to all four schools. But rujuk must be with the intention of making amends, not to cause harm: "do not keep them to harm them" (Surah al-Baqarah 2:231).

7Witnesses to rujuk

Allah says: "…and take as witnesses two just men from among you" (Surah at-Talaq 65:2). Scholars differ on whether this command is obligatory or recommended:

• Shafi'i — later position (qaul jadid): recommended; earlier position (qaul qadim): obligatory.
• Hanafi and Maliki — recommended (mustahab).
• Hanbali — two narrations; the well-known one recommended, the other obligatory.

8Registering rujuk in Malaysia

Act 303 and the state enactments require a ruju' to be reported to the Registrar so that it is recorded (Act 303 s.51(2): within seven days). Practical points:

• Husband and wife attend the district religious affairs office with the divorce certificate and identity documents.
• If the wife does not agree to the rujuk on grounds permitted by Hukum Syarak, she cannot be forced to live with him; the court may appoint arbiters (hakam) to resolve it.
• Failing to report a ruju' is an offence. In the Federal Territories the report must be made within seven days, and the penalty is a fine not exceeding RM500 or imprisonment not exceeding six months or both (Act 303 s.51(2) and (5)). The Sarawak Ordinance (s.50) is the same. The Kedah Enactment 2008 (s.52) and the Terengganu Enactment 2017 (s.49, unofficial copy) impose the same maximum penalty, but their text states no number of days. Other states not yet checked (check the latest rule with your state Syariah Court).
• If the ʿiddah has ended without rujuk, the talaq becomes a minor irrevocable talaq (ba'in sughra) — remarriage requires a new marriage contract and a new mahr, as well as ordinary marriage registration.

9Mut'ah (consolatory gift)

Allah says: "And for divorced women is a provision (mutʿah) according to what is acceptable — a duty upon the righteous" (Surah al-Baqarah 2:241). See also 2:236 for a wife divorced before consummation and before the mahr is fixed.

• Shafi'i school (later position, qaul jadid): mutʿah is obligatory for a wife divorced after consummation, so long as the divorce was not caused by the wife.
• Maliki school: recommended; Hanafi school: obligatory for a wife divorced before consummation and without a fixed mahr, recommended for others.
• The amount is determined according to the husband's means (2:236) and the wife's circumstances.

In Malaysia, a wife divorced without just cause can apply for mutʿah in the Syariah Court (Act 303 s.56 and the equivalent provisions in state enactments). The court assesses the length of the marriage, the wife's contribution and the husband's means.

Sources & references