Can we set 'rules' for fighting so that it does not damage our relationship?

Wise couples agree on limits while calm, so that fights do not cross the line when they are angry. Good rules include: no shouting, no insulting each other's character or family, no dragging up old issues, no bringing up divorce, and no fighting in front of the children. Agree too that either of you can ask for a pause, and that the issue will be resumed, not abandoned. Write these rules down together and put them somewhere easy to see. When someone crosses a limit, remind them gently, not with mockery. Agreed rules make conflict safer and easier to repair. Review and improve these rules from time to time. See communication & emotions.