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⚖️ Polygyny: rulings & justice · #124

I feel guilty towards my first wife after taking a second. How do I deal with it without becoming unfair?

Guilt should not make you favour one wife to soothe your own heart, because that turns into injustice towards the other. Deal with the feeling by improving your treatment, not with lopsided gifts that only relieve your own guilt. If you were unfair in the past, admit it and correct it now. Listen patiently to your first wife's hurt without making your second wife the target. Make sure each wife still receives her outward rights in full. If guilt weighs on you so much that it affects the household, talk to a counsellor. See counselling.

Sources

Sunan Abu Dawud 2133 (sahih)
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This answer is general reference, not a fatwa. For your situation, consult the religious affairs office, a Syarie lawyer or your state Syariah Court.

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