🕊️ Conflict & resolution · #112
In the middle of a fight, I get so angry that I either go silent or explode. What do I do?
When anger peaks, the body goes into 'fight or flight' mode, and at that moment no good discussion is possible. The Prophet ﷺ said: “When one of you becomes angry while standing, let him sit down. If the anger leaves him, well and good; otherwise, let him lie down” (Sunan Abu Dawud 4782). Learn your own early warning signs, such as a pounding heart or a shaking voice, and stop before you explode. Say calmly: ‘I need ten minutes to calm down, then we will continue.’ Use that time to breathe deeply, not to line up arguments. Come back once you have calmed down and resolve the issue, because walking away from it altogether also hurts your spouse. See communication & emotions.
Sources
Sunan Abu Dawud 4782 (sahih)