MYPolygyny.com
Knowledge for the Muslim household
Flashcards Lineage

Q&A › Khitbah & engagement

💍 Khitbah & engagement · #104

My future husband borrowed money to pay the hantaran. Should I be worried?

It deserves attention, because that debt will become a burden on both of you after the akad. Ask frankly about the amount and his repayment plan, without an accusing tone. Perhaps he did it because he was afraid of disappointing your family. If so, this is a chance to discuss the hantaran amount again with the family. A household that starts with unnecessary debt easily comes under strain, especially in the first year. Consider a smaller celebration, and get debt management advice from AKPK if needed. His attitude when discussing this also shows how he will manage the family's money. See debt before marriage.
← PreviousDoes the bride's side need to return gift trays (dulang), and how many?Next →Can a man propose by WhatsApp message alone, without a family delegation?

Related questions

I am a male convert and my family is not Muslim. Who can represent me in making a proposal?You can propose yourself, or ask a Muslim you respect, such as a religious teacher or close friend, to act as your repre…During our engagement, he has started controlling my clothes, my friends and where I go. Should I be worried?Yes, ever tighter control over your clothes, movements and relationships is a serious danger sign, not a sign…My fiancé(e) keeps asking for money or expensive gifts before the wedding. Should I be worried?Yes, it can be a warning sign; repeated requests for money before marriage, especially with various emergency stor…I have had a broken engagement before. Do I need to tell the man who is proposing to me now?You are not obliged to tell him the details, but being open about the fact is usually better than him hearing it from …My fiancé has a physical disability and my family is hesitant. How do I explain to them?A physical disability does not prevent someone from being a good husband or wife. What needs to be weighed is religio…My parents have not yet agreed to my proposing to the girl I have chosen. How do I persuade them?First listen fully to their reasons, because you cannot answer a worry you do not yet understand. Perhaps they …
This answer is general reference, not a fatwa. For your situation, consult the religious affairs office, a Syarie lawyer or your state Syariah Court.

Comments or feedback

Read only by the MYPolygyny administrator — never published.

🔒 Do not include sensitive personal details. Privacy notice

About Us · Ask · Site Map · Privacy · Editorial policy · Disclaimer