We have different expectations about the roles of husband and wife. How do we reconcile them?

Different expectations about roles need to be discussed openly, not assumed from the way each of you was raised. Everyone brings a picture of roles from their parents' home, and those pictures are often not the same. Sit together and discuss what you expect about maintenance (nafkah), housework, decision-making and, later, caring for children. Hold firmly to the Shariah framework of rights and responsibilities, but carry it out through discussion and give-and-take to suit your circumstances. Adjust when circumstances change. Voicing expectations early prevents pent-up disappointment. See rights of husband and wife.