My family's wedding customs and those of my husband-to-be's family from a neighbouring country are very different. How do we bring them together without anyone feeling hurt?

Hold first to what Islamic law requires, namely a valid contract, the mahr and a modest wedding feast (walimah); the rest of the customs can be negotiated. Every place has its own way of proposing, sending gifts and celebrating the couple, and most of these are permissible as long as they do not conflict with Islamic law. Ask a respected representative from each family to discuss it, not just the two of you. Choose one or two customs from each side that mean the most to them, and respectfully explain the customs that cannot be followed. For example, say: ‘We want the family there to feel valued too, so we will follow their way for the reception welcoming the new in-law.’ See walimah.