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💍 Khitbah & pertunangan · #43

May we get engaged ourselves without our parents' knowledge?

A promise to marry between two people is not forbidden, but hiding it from the wali and family is unwise and contrary to the purpose of khitbah.
In the Shafi'i school, a woman's marriage is not valid without a wali, so the family must be involved in the end anyway. Secret engagements often lead to unsupervised meetings, promises that cannot be kept, and conflict with the family. Involve the wali and parents from the start; if they object, listen to their reasons and ask a respected third party to mediate. If the wali refuses without a Shariah reason, there is a wali hakim procedure through the court. Never opt for a secret or cross-border marriage without registration. See counselling.

Sumber

Narrated by Abu Dawud and at-Tirmidhi (sahih): 'There is no marriage except with a wali'Surah al-Isra' 17:23
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Soalan berkaitan

We have been engaged a long time and fear falling into sin. May we marry first and hold the ceremony later?Yes, and it is often better than prolonging the engagement. An akad nikah that meets the pillars and is registered law…We are engaged. May we go out to eat or for walks, just the two of us?You may not be alone together (khalwat), because an engaged couple are still not mahram to each other. An engagement is only…May we have a 'pre-wedding' photo shoot while engaged?A pre-wedding photo shoot involving touching, being alone together or uncovered ʿawrah is not permitted, because the couple are not yet…Is an engagement ceremony sunnah or custom? May it be held on a grand scale?An engagement ceremony is a permissible custom, not a specific sunnah; what is recommended is the walimah after the akad. Islam allow…May one propose or become engaged while in ihram for hajj or umrah?No; the Prophet ﷺ forbade a person in ihram from marrying, giving in marriage or proposing. Uthman bin Affan r.a. narrated the Prophet's ﷺ words…A man who already has four wives — may he get engaged to another woman first?No; proposing to a woman who is not yet lawful to marry at that time is forbidden. The maximum number of wives at one time is…
Jawapan ini rujukan umum, bukan fatwa. Untuk keadaan anda, rujuk pejabat agama, peguam syarie atau Mahkamah Syariah negeri.

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